Boss baby lessons to be a rockstar employee
What babies can teach us about management & leadership
Welcome back to Future of Work, Future of You. I am obsessed with being a parent & even more obsessed with how to make the most of my parenthood in myriad ways. To a point where I am now fully convinced that we adults can learn a ton by simply observing our little ones play out their natural self. Today’s issue offers a mini MBA (Masters in Baby Administration) for adult professionals. If you like what you read, don’t forget to hit subscribe.
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Credits: https://www.comingsoon.net/movies/news/852609-boss-baby-sequel-in-the-works-for-2021#/slide/1
When I became a dad in early 2021, I told myself that my days of professional indulgence were over. Gone are the 14 hour workdays or high flying coast-to-coast travel every week. My squeaky clean outlook calendar that was all work stuff till now was yet to witness the bloodbath of personal time blocks.
As we raised our kid over the past 18 months with a love-hate parenting passion, I have but understood one thing. There is way more to raising a child than diapers, distress & daily debacles.
Look closely.
Your child is an undiluted masterpiece in human manipulation, relentless goal seeking & action orientation. To a point where I oddly think that someone should have already come up with a 3 month MBA (Masters in Baby Administration) program for adults. This would distill all the learnings from these innocent wicked souls that swoop in our lives & change it forever for good.
While some intellectual academic takes me up on this offer, I couldn’t resist to share my two cents on broad topics that will be of incredible interest to wannabe leaders & managers.
I will also go on a limp & predict that a lot of these lessons are critical to succeed in the future of work. Whether you are building a company, community or culture, these are incredibly valuable. If you execute these in your day-to-day work, trust me you will never again fail for the lack of pay, promotion or prestige at your workplace.
Lesson 1: Disproportionate mindshare
Let me rephrase this. Babies have an ability to capture disturbingly disproportionate mindshare of their parents' time, attention & breath.
Did I forget to pee all day ?
Did I skip a meal?
Did I forget to pay bills?
Did I catch a few less breaths in a day?
These are all scarily plausible outcomes when you are living your life in the infant metaverse. Einstein’s relativity theory comes to life in unique ways. To a parent sitting inside the infant metaverse, they would look at a person in the real world & see holidays, pub parties, drunk evenings, lazy weekends all whiz by in a blink.
But I digress. We are talking about corporate lessons!
Babies paint a larger than life vision of genetic continuity & procreative purpose. This hooks in would be parents to take the bait.
As corporate leaders, we need to do the same to convince our bosses of a how-I-contribute-to-universe purpose that allows us their massive mindshare. A vision that is tied to our innate existence & ability to improve it incrementally.
Once your boss begins throwing time & attention at you, you have won half the battle. The other half is to drug him into doing that painlessly day in & day out. You can now roll the wish list of work concessions.
A key project assignment. Check
Double digit pay raise. Check
A 4 week vacation to Hawaii. Check
A ticket to a conference in Barcelona. Check
Steady stream of OOO responders. Check
Lesson 2: Pushing buttons
Babies come out of the box with three key buttons that can activate in any sequence without prior warning. The key is to draw consistent patterns & learn from them. If employees could imbibe these buttons in them, god help their bosses.
1. Leave-me-alone button
The most innocuous state which activates several times a day with no major repercussions for people around. A baby playing by themselves, embracing screen time or any independent activity that doesn’t require TLC can be put up in this category.
An equivalent corporate behavior is independent work people do without any micro management or dumb interference from bosses. Work gets done & everyone is happy with their desired outcomes.
We all yearn to not be micromanaged by our managers & peers. Now imagine how babies draw the line & condition us parents to know when to step away. Every employee should have their leave-me-alone button & activate it when your superiors poke their nose too much.
2. Melt-you button
Yes, I am talking about that heart-warming slanted smile or a full teeth spectacle that feels like warm fuzzy chocolate. Or an innocent hilarious play that has you in splits. Babies know exactly when to schmooze parents into submission.
A slightly dubious but a perfectly legitimate behavior is schmoozing, ego massaging your superiors. This arises from a temporal need to seek certain incentives such as a pay, promotion or a desired project.
We all hate when someone else does it on our team. But let’s face it. We all need a melt-you button to suck up to our bosses sometimes. Building rapport & connect merely shines a brighter light on all the good work we do every single day. There is nothing wrong in it. So next time when your boss asks you to join for drinks or happy hour, consider saying Yes.
3. Nuke-you button
We all parents have been here. Haven’t we??
That wall shattering or brain splitting infant cry which makes us question our existence. Or when our kids roll on the floor incessantly demanding that popsicle or M&M. Or when they are smart enough to humiliate you in public by making a mockery of themselves.
Kids know when to nuke their parents & make them surrender unconditionally. There is no resistance. There is no negotiation. Kids walk out with what they want. Period.
Do employees ever do this to their manager?
Or maybe ask a different question. Do employees think there are situations where nuking their manager or team is the best option?
I feel most employees feel too helpless to consider this option. Throw in a resignation. Confront your boss if needed. At times, being forceful & assertive is the only option to get what you want.
Once in a while, employees should nuke their manager & make themselves heard. That’s what babies do & parents get the message. So should managers.
Lesson 3: Above & Beyond
I realized this when I saw my 6 month old take 50-60 chances while sitting up every single day. He would bump his face on the couch, his toys, the wooden floor & steep stairs. Yet he never gave up. Absolutely never. At times he would fall from a previous attempt a minute back & would be back at it trying to sit up again. Such ferocious resilience & can do attitude. We then saw him do the same while trying to stand on his feet. He would not want to crawl out of sheer self respect & dignity to experience the world on his own feet.
And then he wanted to climb on the couch. Then on the table. Then go up the stairs. Then open the door knob. Every time the playbook remained the same. Unstoppable persistence to keep at it till he dropped dead tired.
As adults, we slowly become prisoners to our self-inflicted maturity. Our persistence becomes subservient to our skills, knowledge & worldly perspectives of how we should be. An adult mind takes over the beginner's mind but we mustn’t let it be. Future of work will belong to employees who see infinite possibilities in every new problem or situation. An ability to see the same world with a new lens. And more importantly, an ability to demonstrate infinite fortitude & persistence to keep at a problem till it is solved.
Lesson 4: Baby Weapon of mass destruction (BWMD)
I can see all you parents smiling at this one.
Yes you know this well.
If we were to put all babies together with their insane cries in unison, no amount of US & Russian nukes could counter this impact. Babies use their weapon at will to inject terror in the minds of their parents.
Stuffing too much food during meal time?
Dragging them out from their favorite park against their will?
Changing diapers too often?
Snatching M&Ms they accidentally accessed?
Good luck. You are risking unilateral emotional destruction.
In work circles, I feel this is the least known & most under utilized skill. Most employees & leaders don’t know what they are so good at that makes their boss sweat in their sleep. Every employee should know their weapon of mass destruction.
A key project, a key skill (excel jockey or client relationship) or a crucial role that no one else can do.
Summary
Babies come with a clear vision - Instant & complete domination of their environment. The goal is to do a hostile takeover of physical, digital & mental assets at their disposal. And then gradually but definitively rewire them towards their newfound outcomes. Anyone presenting a semblance of resistance is dealt with forcefully.
Babies are pure, kind & incredibly gifted souls. But they also come with innate genetic capabilities that are worth emulating for adults albeit to a lesser calibrated degree. It is not for nothing that people ask adults not to kill the child within themselves. So make sure to keep the child in you alive even as your child kills the adult in you ;-)
Would love to hear from my readers on how parenthood has impacted them.
What are some of the lessons your kids have taught you?
Have you emerged a better employee or a leader since becoming a parent?
If you have a co-worker, manager, founder or even an entrepreneurial dreamer who needs to see this, please share. You may be helping them more than you realize.
Reach me at Tejaswi Gautam and let me know what you think about this issue. Are you ready for the future of work? See you next week!
The authors argue that an understanding of the decision-making process is critical not only for the explanation of the individual leader’s behavior but also for the behavior of complex organizations. The organizational decisionmaking process involves both cognitive and social processes. Generally, events occurring between the identification of a problem and its solution or decision are both intrapersonal and interpersonal; the interpersonal or social aspects of decisionmaking are most directly relevant to the processes of leadership.